I was out walking my dog early this morning, which frankly at 5am can be a little spooky with just the baseline chill and darkness. But something happened between Monday and today to make the world a more mysterious and deadly place, Halloween decorations.
Now I’m explaining to my dog that the tombstones in someone’s yard are not a threat, and that the flashing light across the corner is not gunfire, but someone’s idea of fun. I walk under street lights and by orange strands of the nightmare before Christmas lights. And I have the resist the urge to literally punch a cackling skeleton pirate at the thrift store yesterday. It was right by the checkout aisle and was continuously being set off (while some of us where just trying to browse for CD’s). If I worked in that place I would have beaten that thing to a plastic pulp after a few hours of that maniacal laughter.
Now don’t get me wrong, I like Halloween, specifically the candy and movies part. On Beggar’s Night I will sit on my porch, playing spooky music out of my laptop (or watching the classic Trek episode Catspaw), and handing out chocolate (because that is the best candy no matter what anyone tries to tell you). I will complement people’s costumes, and reward the unique and the strange with extra candy. Fair warning, Power Rangers and Twilight characters get nothing. Also teenagers above the age of 14 should be handing out candy, not asking me for it (if you hand it out, you still get to eat it).
In the month leading up to Halloween I will make a point of watching It’s The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, Young Frankenstein, the aforementioned Catspaw and all 25 Simpson’s Treehouse of Horror episodes (including the new one). I’ll equally throw in a couple of the Home Improvement Halloween episodes, Boston Legal, Community and maybe Garfield (though frankly that one is kinda bad).
I will even succumb to eating a little candy corn which is like eating candle wax but is strangely irresistible each year.
But decorating for Halloween like it’s Christmas, this I can do without. Actually you can do whatever you want, but if you have a ghost on your front lawn that spooks my dog, don’t be surprised to find it chewed to bits the next morning 😉
What are your Halloween traditions (and am I way off about the decorating thing being weird)?
[BTW] : Ben Trube, Writer 
It’s only weird when the decorating starts 6 weeks prior to the event. By the time Halloween night arrives, I’m ready to turn my porch light off and leave the premises! Same thing goes for Christmas – Halloween is not here and Christmas décor is out in stores. My neighbor leaves his lights up all year and when the time comes he just plugs them in! I’m sorry, but I think that’s a little tacky.
Tacky, and voiding the electrical warranty of those Christmas lights. Seriously, they’re only designed for about 90 days outside (says probably the only one who read all the random pieces of paper in the new light box). I agree that holidays don’t seem to come in the right order, at least in stores, though I’ve yet to see anything Christmas (though I know it’s coming). I like handing out candy, but some of the other craziness I don’t understand. Good luck!
My family carve pumpkins for halloween and put them outside, purely so the parents know they can bring their kiddies round for some sweeties. I don’t really get the idea of decorating the outside of the house for Halloween OR Christmas. I kind of see it as a bit of a showing off contest with the neighbours which, frankly, i don’t have time for. For me, the inside is where i like to go crazy. Halloween parties are awesome. I LOVE them. I also used to work for a party product company where staff are allowed to buy stock from the warehouse at cost so i would always get stuff for whoever was hosting that year.
Hosting parties is fun. I did a Treehouse of Horror themed party one year, complete with Uterbraten and Sloppy Jimbos and of course the sprinkle donuts. I like to carve pumpkins too, though I often think of it a little late. I’m definitely of the same inclination, decorating inside more than out, though we’ll string a few lights for Christmas, and my wife always makes a nice wreath for our door, no matter the season.